I support the second amendment…and like most people our household arsenal has expanded over the last year. I do want it to be known that it hasn’t expanded on my behalf as I’m happy with my little handheld (and yes I’ve taken a concealed carry) that I purchased after a doe attacked Jazz in the yard. But, that arsenal can come in handy…as Ryan and I found out the other night.
It was a typical Friday night in our household. We were both reclining on the couch, Ryan was catching up on tv shows we had recorded throughout the week, and I was halfheartedly watching while trying to catch up on computer stuff that was behind…like always it seems.
Ryan usually heads to bed a couple of hours before I do, and that night was no different. Around 11, the laptop screen was getting blurry, so I put it on the coffee table and stumbled towards the back of the house shutting off the lights as I went. When I reached the bedroom, I realized I had left my Ipad on the kitchen counter and I can’t fall asleep unless getting lost in some meaningless book, so I returned to the kitchen stumbling back through the dark…and there in the living room window was a blue light.
Okay, picture this…we live in the boonies. We have no yard light or outside lights. Our closest neighbors are my parents, which are a mile away. I don’t like scary movies. I had been watching a cop show that was solving a murder. Jazz had been acting weird all night, and earlier there was something digging around the outside of the house.
I pegged this light placement as someone or something that was either sitting on our patio, or on top of the patio table. After closer examination from the darkened kitchen, I discovered as miniscule as it was, the light was moving.
So, I do what every good wife does…I went and woke Ryan up.
“Ryan, there’s a blue light in our window, and it’s moving!”
“What?”
“Ryan, there’s a blue light in our window and it’s moving!!”
Ryan stumbled out of bed, walked down the darkened hall into the kitchen and froze.
“What the heck is that thing?”
He moved around the counter in the kitchen and tiptoed out into the living room. Meanwhile I’m being the brave one and hiding behind the kitchen counter.
“Can you see what it is?”
“No, but it’s moving!!”
Ryan tries to convince me to come closer as I have the better vision. I refused. I was happy to stay behind the counter. Ryan retreated, and we headed back to the bedroom where he grabbed my gun.
“Whatcha going to do with that?”
“I don’t know, but I’m going to go see if it’s still there.”
“Well I’m going to call the Boss Man!”
“Why are you going to wake him up?”
“If something happens to us, somebody needs to know!!”
Ryan snuck back down the hallway, I picked up the phone almost surprising myself that there WAS a dial tone. I woke the Boss Man up.
“Dad there’s a blue light outside our window, we don’t know what it is…Ryan’s shotguns in the office, grab it and please come down!”
Of course that had to be repeated a couple times till the Boss Man was coherent enough to realize I was almost hysterical.
So what does a person do in the ten minutes until the calvary comes? Oh, you know things like go into a spare room and grab another gun. I don’t know what it is…it’s like the ones in movies that shoots a lot and has the laser that somebody freaks out over. I thought I could pull the case down the hallway and into the kitchen. Yes, the blue light was still in the window swaying, so I ran back down the hallway pulling the camo bag to the bedroom where I sat next to it. Because a gun in a bag that I don’t know how to shoot is going to protect me! Ryan’s paranoid, I’m focusing on my breathing trying to not induce an anxiety attack. The calvary has not shown up yet. I pull the bag into the bathroom and sneak a peek out of the corner of the bathroom curtain.
“Maybe they got him too!!!”
Ryan’s trying to calm me down. I see headlights pulling up into the yard. I collect every bit of nerve that I had left and run into the living room, around the coffee table, and up to the window….
The light disappears.
I move.
The light reappears.
Even in my weakened state, my brain registered pretty quick that the light was…
Yes, it was a reflection from the laptop I had lazily placed on the coffee table instead of putting it back where it belongs.
I sheepishly walked to the door as the Boss Man was coming up the steps. He took one look at my face…
“Figured it out huh?”
“Um, yeah…I’ll see you in the morning.”