There’s a running family joke about maintenance. For some reason the Boss Man and his wife decided a couple of years ago to associate “high maintenance” with yours truly. I’m all for nicknames and connotations, but this one would bristle my arm hair, make my jaw clench, and pretty much make me go into full female mode in record time.
There were numerous discussions about the definition. My opinion of “high maintenance” was someone that had every hair in place, would spend excessive dinero to make sure they not only looked their best, but had the best. In other words someone that you would read about in the tabloids, not living on a ranch.
I still to this day do not know what the Boss Man’s definition is….
I pulled out every argument in the book. “I don’t think you can label me if I don’t comb my hair but once a week, have grease under the fingernails, and seriously how many times have you threatened to throw out those couple pairs of my favorite work jeans because you’re afraid unexpected company might show up and see my underwear?”
The teasing still wouldn’t end.
A couple years have gone, and I hadn’t thought about the whole “high maintenance” thingy until Ryan and I were watching The Voice this last week, and I informed him that I would cut off part of one of my fingers for a pair of Louboutins. It’s tough to justify buying a $2000 pair of heels, when you can buy a new herd addition for that, well and there’s the gravel and manure…I bet it would be the first pair of Louboutins that were filled with sand while fueling a pickup. Doesn’t mean a girl can’t dream right??
Lets just say that Ryan laughed…kind of hysterically. So, instead of my dream heels, I guess that means I will just continue to valet park (the pickup won’t fit in most garages), use the handlebar and thumb heaters on the ATV, wear designer jeans (it’s incentive to not work in them), and get cranky if a restaurant can’t cook my steak right (it’s easy-put it on, flip it over, pull it off).
As for the nickname? I did stop chopping yesterday, because I HAD to get out of the tractor and scrap the dog…um…(there is not political correct way to say what I was thinking) off my shoe…and there’s the Boss Man smirking and if looks could speak I bet “high maintenance” would of come out!
