The in-laws came to visit last weekend. It’s always enjoyable when they come up to the ranch, and this time was no different. After branding on Saturday, I needed to go through a couple group of pairs to make sure that we had no sick ones, and if so to doctor whatever needed doctored. The in-laws jumped in the UTV, Ryan grabbed an ATV and they all tagged along.
As I’ve mentioned before we do the majority of our calving from April 20 to May 10th. Pairs are in groups of 150 or less to make branding and pasture rotation a little easier until we start combining groups. It’s nothing for me to travel 25-50 miles on the ATV in a day looking through pairs. I’ve had to learn over the last eleven years of being home how to doctor calves off of the ATV. I’d like to think I’ve got it down to an art form balancing on the right side while driving with my left hand, pulling right alongside the calf, jumping off and grabbing a back leg.
Why looking through pairs with the troop, I found a calf that needed to be doctored. I told Ryan to catch him (Ryan’s never caught one off an ATV before). With no instruction he pulled alongside the calf and bailed off (to tackle him I think). The calf went one way and Ryan bit dirt. I mean bit dirt! The best part was not only were the in-laws watching, but when he landed he evidently found a juicy pile of you know what that smeared down his left side. Even though I was trying not to, I laughed and laughed.
So yesterday the Boss Man and I moved pairs off of the home pivot. I was riding the Mexican Donkey (my three year old stud colt), I saw a sick calf, and since I was not carrying vaccine with me, went back with the ATV later in the morning.
I located the heifer calf, got my vaccine and tuber ready and positioned myself on the ATV. The calf took off running, and I drove alongside of her, bailed off and caught a back leg. As soon as I caught the calf, I realized I was in trouble. The heifer had a good 50lbs on me and wasn’t as sick as I thought she was. I’m about 15 feet away from the ATV, and realize that I don’t know if I’m going to be able to pull her over. I analyzed the situation as fast as you can when your hand is slipping and the heifer won’t stop jerking and acted on the first thought which was to grab the other back leg. The heifer jerked, knocked me off balance and next thing I know, I’m still hanging on to one back leg, but I’m now sliding across the pasture on my stomach. Ten feet slides by, and I’m realizing yeah, this idea sucks. Not only that, but if I can get up by some crazy wild chance there is no way in heck that I’m going to be able to get her over to the ATV…so I let go.
I push myself up off the ground, and realize that half the pasture is now down my pants. Luckily the boonies has its advantages, and it only took me about five minutes to try and get the dirt out of places it definitely did not belong. I grab my rope off the front of the ATV, jump back on and after what all just transpired throw a halfhearted loop at the heifer. I missed, which was probably what my brain was thinking was the smart idea. I get back on the ATV, and realize that I can’t go home until this critter is taken care of so I take off with new determination, pull alongside the calf, jump off, and throw a loop that she jumps through, and I pull up slack and (God was looking down) caught both back legs. Once again I’m a long way from the ATV, so I start inching it forward, rolling up my slack, inching forward, rolling up slack until I’m within about five feet where I dally off on the ATV and get the heifer doctored.
I texted Ryan on the way back to the house.
“Just so you know I filled my shorts (and I’m not talking about the athletic ones) with dirt once again.”
His reply?
“Better than filling them with something else!”
I guess I know what they say about payback now.